City Council Ponders: Should We Give Ourselves a Raise?

                

  It was a time of great soul searching for city-council members in the City of Alt Losses. Should they increase their stipends from $300 to $950 a month and triple their benefits to $11,000 a year—an increase that the state of California just allowed? A special meeting was called to consider this all important question (during a 49ers football game). 

 "The increase would cover the cost of gasoline (for the 2-to-3mile drive) to our bi-monthly meetings," they agreed. "It would pay for our printer cartridges." "We could attract more lower-income people to run against us," they reasoned self-righteously, "especially full-time working moms with lots of kids."

 One council member asked, "Does the increased health-insurance benefit include free facelifts?" "Facelifts? Yes," Staff responed. "Free? No. There's a $20 copay."

 "And how will this affect the City's already stressed budget?" absolutely no one asked.

 After much thoughtful discussion, the question came to a tense vote in which the council members unanimously agreed to give themselves every conceivable increase allowed by law,  and after a full 11 minutes, the special meeting was adjourned.


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